"Oh! You! Look! So! Bea-u-ti-ful! Tonight!"

I saw U2 again two nights ago, this time with my brother - trying not to give in to jet lag - by my side. Bono provided me with another great band name: "everyday surrealist." I think that's going on the list of fake band names for my fake band t-shirt business, whose profits will be donated to the J Goes to Turkey Charity.

Other names on the list include:

- Existential Dinosaur Stuff
- Feed the Cat
- The Epigramatic Wad
- Coffee... Now.
- Super Ticky-Tack
- A Wasp Nest Waiting To Be Stirred
- The Happy Alcoholidays

And, of course:

- Fishing In a Bucket

T-shirts do not include logos, but do have tour dates on the back. All tours consist of no more than four or five places, and all places are ridiculously named, such as Pee Paw, New York, or Moose Jaw, SK. T-shirts are 100% cotton and very likely not ethically made. Interested parties can place an order by emailing me. Prices vary depending on how much I like you.