The One About Ice-Cream Sandwiches
Summer, to me, means ice-cream sandwiches (ICSs ). Summer is kind of my least favourite time of year. I love the fall best, because you get to wear cute clothes and a leather jacket every day and the colours on the leaves look great with my skin tone, so I look extra-good even just standing in front of a tree. Spring is second-favourite but is somewhat marred by my occasional allergies. Winter is third, because it's cold. But summer is last because of the heat, but at least you get to have ICSs every day.
Because I am a kind and altruistic person, I have bought and tasted a number of different brands of ICSs and, having contemplated the ratios of cookie to ice-cream thoroughly, have put together this list, rating all ICSs on a scale of one (fan-f'n-tastic) to ten (not worth the calories).
A. Good Humour. These are, by far, the best bars. They have more ice cream than the other brands; this balances out the proportion between ice cream and cookie. The problem is, you can't find these in boxes; or, I haven't found them. You can only buy them individually at delis, and they're pretty expensive. rating: 1
B. Blue Bunny. These are awful. The only thing to recommend them is that they're cheap. We didn't even finish our box – we just threw them out. rating: 10
C. Turkey Hill Farm. These are so expensive I didn't even bother to try them. rating: unknown
D. Carnation Neopolitan. These are weird. The ice cream is weirdly thinner than in the Carnation Vanilla. Also, the whole point of Neopolitan is that you can mix the chocolate with strawberry, or the strawberry with vanilla, (never chocolate and vanilla – ugh!) with your spoon. The cookie hinders this central facet to eating Neopolitan. Plus, the chocolate cookie and chocolate ice cream are too much together, and this comes from someone who considers chocolate the most important food group. A strawberry ICS wouldn't go amiss, though. rating: 6
E. Carnation Neopolitan. This is the best investment: solid cookie, solid ice cream, not too expensive, and you buy them in boxes at a normal supermarket, sometimes even at a bodega. rating: 8
F. White Rose. They're very thin; you can have 2 in a day and not feel guilty. the ice-cream is creamy and thick; the wafers just the right chocolateyness. rating: 7
G. Weight Watchers. These are also very thin, a little too thin. The ice-cream is good; the cookie is acceptable but could stand to be a tad richer/chocloatey-er. Sal once referred to the cookie as "cardboard". rating: 5
Obviously these are all store-bought brands. Very soon I will start investigating the gourmet ICSs that are available around the city only in summer.
Because I am a kind and altruistic person, I have bought and tasted a number of different brands of ICSs and, having contemplated the ratios of cookie to ice-cream thoroughly, have put together this list, rating all ICSs on a scale of one (fan-f'n-tastic) to ten (not worth the calories).
A. Good Humour. These are, by far, the best bars. They have more ice cream than the other brands; this balances out the proportion between ice cream and cookie. The problem is, you can't find these in boxes; or, I haven't found them. You can only buy them individually at delis, and they're pretty expensive. rating: 1
B. Blue Bunny. These are awful. The only thing to recommend them is that they're cheap. We didn't even finish our box – we just threw them out. rating: 10
C. Turkey Hill Farm. These are so expensive I didn't even bother to try them. rating: unknown
D. Carnation Neopolitan. These are weird. The ice cream is weirdly thinner than in the Carnation Vanilla. Also, the whole point of Neopolitan is that you can mix the chocolate with strawberry, or the strawberry with vanilla, (never chocolate and vanilla – ugh!) with your spoon. The cookie hinders this central facet to eating Neopolitan. Plus, the chocolate cookie and chocolate ice cream are too much together, and this comes from someone who considers chocolate the most important food group. A strawberry ICS wouldn't go amiss, though. rating: 6
E. Carnation Neopolitan. This is the best investment: solid cookie, solid ice cream, not too expensive, and you buy them in boxes at a normal supermarket, sometimes even at a bodega. rating: 8
F. White Rose. They're very thin; you can have 2 in a day and not feel guilty. the ice-cream is creamy and thick; the wafers just the right chocolateyness. rating: 7
G. Weight Watchers. These are also very thin, a little too thin. The ice-cream is good; the cookie is acceptable but could stand to be a tad richer/chocloatey-er. Sal once referred to the cookie as "cardboard". rating: 5
Obviously these are all store-bought brands. Very soon I will start investigating the gourmet ICSs that are available around the city only in summer.
posted by j | 9:11 AM
2 Comments:
Jam, can you believe that you can't get ice-cream sandwhiches in the U.K.???? They haven't discovered them yet. I have had many a rant about this issue in recent months...
That is criminal!! Can't you do your phd from the t-dot?! Or - if I sent you some in the mail, do you think they would melt before they got to the UK?
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